Growth and maturity

In our Bible Doctrines class at church we are currently covering Savlation, and will soon be moving on to Christ. As I started to prepare this week, I began by referencing my notes from my class at MBBC.

I have a habit of keeping all my notes. I am certain that if I were to go through all the boxes I have at my parents house still, I would find Sunday School handouts from as far back as 5th-6th grade.  It comes in useful sometimes.

For example when I need to teach Bible Doctrines I can reference my notes from seminary. 🙂 What I found with my notes are the papers I needed to write, and the reading that I had done, along with several journal articles I had printed for referencing.

Though I remember my papers, and some of the arguments I made, I don’t often recall the answers on the tests, and I find it interesting to reread my writing style.

Sometimes, I read a paper, and think I couldn’t right a paper that complete any more. I admire the work, in the same sense I might admire an argument that Turretin makes. Other times, I see my work, and am disgusted and wonder how I could have thought that a particular point should have come after the other, and not before as it obviously should.

What I found most interesting this time however is my handwritten notes. I wrote things that I was adamant about. I wrote with exclamation points. I wrote with inflated punctuation. I questioned particular sentences as over the top, or not strong enough.

Today, as I read them, I am happy to see two different things. One, I have changed. I would not write certain things anymore. My position on a certain subject has been tempered by further Scripture. I have grown. I see where my zealousness lead me.

But two, I see things that I had correct as well. Statements made well, and with purpose. Correct evaluations (in that I would still agree with them today).

It is a great comfort to me to see both things. The latter because it gives me strength and hope that I have not been a complete fool, and the former because had I not found anything amiss amongst my things I would worry.

I am far from perfect, and my writings, like the rest of my life, should reflect a growth and a maturity over time. I will most assuredly panic when I find that I am no longer refining, or adjusting. When I find I am no longer intrigued or interested in Scripture, and that I believe the exact same things I did years ago, I will need a good jarring.

Certainly, we can come to the knowledge of the truth, and the Gospel. Certainly, we can learn, and have understanding. My previous post stated this most plainly. It is the statement of Scripture that we can have understanding and knowledge of the truth.

On the other hand, we cannot attain unto the infinite wonder of God and His revelation. We must ever be learning. We must never be content with the little bit that we see. Now we see through a glass darkly. Let us continue to study to shew ourselves approved unto God, workmen that need not be ashamed as we rightly divide the word of truth. We must study, and pray that God will continue to open our eyes. Let us not be satisfied with the milk of the word. Let us go on to meat. Meat belongeth to them that are of full age, who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern good and evil.

Lord, let me never be as a babe content with milk, but bring me to age so that I may have meat, and further enable me to bear more meat today and each day, than previously before.

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